Tuesday, February 14, 2012

The Motherhood Roller coaster

Having Small Children is physically draining! It's a fact that is unavoidable, we don't sleep enough, don't get out enough, don't sit enough. Its part of the ride unfortunately we also don't appreciate it enough!

We don't ponder how quickly this time goes or stop often enough to revel in it.
I myself find it very difficult to focus on how wonderful this small period of small children really is.

So when My son brought me my present of the day ( a red rhinestone he told me is a diamond) I forced myself to stop and take it in.
The right now of it all and remind myself that as tiring as it is right now this is my turn.
One day, even though at 4 he claims he isn't getting married. It will be somebody else's turn.
Someone else's turn to care for him, ease his fears, know all his likes and dislikes and make him happy.

It's the roller coaster of Motherhood as you wait on line you feel you will never get there, but once you're on the ride it's fast ups and downs and next thing you know you're off the roller coaster looking over your shoulder at the people behind you waiting in line...

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

A Year Made Up Of Days

I have used this blog mainly as a way to vent and release. Self therapy you could say. SO even though I haven't blogged in... a long time. Today as I face a day in my year here I am releasing.

When you're having a hard year it isn't so much about the year as a whole it's surviving the days. Some are hard some easy some fast some slow it's one day at a time.
The year moves past in a series of days. For me along with everything in what I call "regular life" is the loss of my Grandfather.

Holidays past, Birthdays, Anniversary's, day's when I wanted to share a funny story about my kids, days when I needed advice, days when I needed a hug. Now Here I am facing a year face to face, but I don't recognize it, it's just another day of loss.

Today is different, Rather than find a nice ending or sharing a light bulb moment I'm just going to allow myself to feel whatever it is I'm feeling...

I guess that is my conclusion sometimes we just need to feel whatever it is we are feeling good or bad just let the feeling embrace us and take over.

So whether you are happy or sad, Mad or in love the challenge is... Just let it be. It's only one day in the year...